Every one of my boyfriends has been a ______, and why I changed my life.

Sometimes in my daily life, I'll notice something unknown to me. I'll notice a couple, except that these people are actually very content. The boyfriend is supportive, the girlfriend encouraging and elated. Maybe it was 15 years of only having myself to depend on through my life. Maybe my views on people changed. Every one of my boyfriends was, or turned out to be a criminal. What is insane is that I thought that maybe I could fill them with empathy, or possibly magically make them realize their ways or be able to connect with people. I was wrong and I wasted my time. It was around the beginning of this year when I saw so clearly that I had made a mistake. None of them wanted help at all or appreciated it. Day by day I made small changes beginning with myself, then my diet, the company that I keep, and my values. Life is a lot different now, and I can't ever figure out why on earth I thought that people could be saved. Looking forward to a brighter future, all I am left with is the motto- "I used to look out for people, now I just look out for people".

2/22

12 PM







2. I watched the entire "show" of 2 jets shortly after my arrival around noon. This is the first sight I noticed, until the they circled around and came back to the starting point, all the while turning off the trail in mid flight, waiting a bit until starting it again. At this time a cop was making his rounds, circling in the parking lot. That is pretty well done. The fliers circled around and returned, leaving crap trails in their wake. When all their hard work was done, there was pretty much a nearly completed huge circle, with breaks in the formation intermittedly where you could see that they took a break from their crimes against humanity for a bit. Maybe they confused humans with ditch guppies, and forgot that the human brain can remember more than 10 seconds and has an unusual knack for noticing patterns (so it /has been said) This photo is about 10-15 minutes into the spectacular wonder show, with the first jet returning to the starting area.













30 minutes later. Sensibility and logic makes it almost common knowledge that normal contrails disappear within minutes. I am standing in a large parking lot dedicated to a GM/chemical/additive laden 'food' store. This could in reality be a sci-fi setting, do I need a gas mask in this environment? :P

Last photo was taken almost an hour later. As you can see, the originally photographed formation is on the left of similar looking work. Hmm, working double time today, I suppose. I wish I could have gotten a view of behind me but it was thick with haze which is what the spray trails look like after dispersing.... let me guess- on the radio weather : "cloudy" days, today. Very possible sighting of the newly unleashed unmanned drone, also, shortly after, it sure as hell looked exactly like it, or maybe it was the metal toxicity hitting my brain with the quickness, socially accepted poison. please leave comments and what not if you want, i feel strange and alienated putting these up. Also a while later multiple white trails were sprayed straight across the sky, as pretty soon the respectable, honorable work of geo engineering was completed for the day.







Update: They were at it again-today 2/23 pretty much all morning. http://www.naturalnews.com/034906_Bill_Gates_geo-engineering_chemtrails.html

Barium and Aluminum Found in Florida Rainwater

Puppets

~Puppets~
©2007
I repeat this story although it changes all the time
To take the daily news and throw it in a rhyme
Bizarre things in life I'm forced to hear and see
...Behind the walls surrounding everyday humanity

We blew up the east for weapons of mass destruction
Now the president wants governmental reconstruction
But may be he should pay whatever that will cost
Since we found nothing and a lot of lives were lost

We have sports players who go a little too far
And the media keeps making them a Hollywood star
What kind of role models do we allow for our kids
When they go around acting and living like this

Did you hear of the guy that was on the internet
Who ran an ad that will be so hard to forget
Knowing it’s scary 400 volunteers agreed to meet
After all he wanted people to process, cook and eat

How about the guy who was in a restaurant eating
The police took him outside and gave him a beating
Because he was overweight it wasn’t their fault
When he died from their vicious and savage assault

There is a common virus that’s powerful and new
People have started dying from just having the flu
And now it’s hard to enjoy a warm summer night
Because we can get killed from a mosquito bite

Following the scripts of our personalities pages
Are we merely puppets performing on the stages
If existence is a slave and realities the master
Then life's getting strange as each minute goes faster

Dr. Lawrence Dunegans' Transcripts

CRIME USED TO MANAGE SOCIETY


There would be the created slums and other areas well maintained. Those people able to leave the slums for better areas then would learn to better appreciate the importance of human accomplishment. This meant that if they left the jungle and came to civilisation, so to speak, they could be proud of their own accomplishments that they made it. There was no related sympathy for those who were left behind in the jungle of drugs and deteriorating neighbourhoods. Then a statement that was kind of surprising, "We think we can effectively limit crime to the slum areas, so it won't be spread heavily into better areas". I should maybe point out here that these are obviously not word for word quotations after 20 years, but where I say that I am quoting, I am giving the general drift of what was said close to word for word, perhaps not precisely so. I remember wondering, how can he be so confident that the criminal element is going to stay where he wants it to stay? But he went on to say that increased security would be needed in the better areas. That would mean more police, better co-ordinated police efforts. He did not say so, but I wondered at that time about the moves that were afoot to consolidate all the police departments of suburbs around the major cities. I think the John Birch Society was one that was saying "Support your local police, don't let them be consolidated." I remember wondering if that was one of the things he had in mind about security. It was not explicitly stated. Anyhow he went on to say there would be a whole new industry of residential security systems to develop with alarms and locks and alarms going into the police department so that people could protect their wealth and their well being. Because some of the criminal activity would spill out of the slums into better, more affluent looking areas that looked like they would be worth burglarizing. And again it was stated like it was a redeeming quality: See we're generating all this more crime but look how good we are - we're also generating the means for you to protect yourself against the crime. A sort of repeated thing throughout this presentation was the recognised evil and then the self forgiveness thing, "See we've given you a way out."



CURTAILMENT OF AMERICAN INDUSTRIAL PRE-EMINENCE


American industry came under discussion - it was the first that I'd heard the term global interdependence or that notion. The stated plan was that different parts of the world would be assigned different roles of industry and commerce in a unified global system. The continued pre-eminence of the United States and the relative independence and self-sufficiency of the United States would have to be changed. This was one of the several times that he said in order to create a new structure, you first have to tear down the old, and American industry was one example of that. Our system would have to be curtailed in order to give other countries a chance to build their industries, because otherwise they would not be able to compete against the United States. This was especially true of our heavy industries that would be cut back while the same industries were being developed in other countries, notably Japan. At this point there was some discussion of steel and particularly automobiles - I remember saying that automobiles would be imported from Japan on an equal footing with our own domestically produced automobiles, but the Japanese product would be better. Things would be made so they would break and fall apart, that is in the United States. so that people would tend to prefer the imported variety and this would give a bit of a boost to foreign competitors.


One example was the Japanese. In 1969 Japanese automobiles, if they were sold here at all I don't remember, but they certainly weren't very popular. But the idea was you could get a little bit disgusted with your Ford, GM or Chrysler product or whatever because little things like window handles would fall off more and plastic parts would break which had they been made of metal would hold up. Your patriotism about buying American would soon give way to practicality that if you bought Japanese, German or imported that it would last longer and you would be better off. Patriotism would go down the drain. It was mentioned elsewhere things being made to fall apart too. I don't remember specific items or if they were even stated other than automobiles, but I do recall of having the impression, sort of in my imagination, of a surgeon having  something fall apart in his hands in the operating room at a critical time. Was he including this sort of thing in his discussion? But somewhere in this discussion about things being made deliberately defective and unreliable not only was to tear down patriotism but to be just a little source of irritation to people who would use such things. Again the idea that you not feel terribly secure, promoting the notion that the world isn't a terribly reliable place. The United States was to be kept strong in information, communications, high technology, education and agriculture. The United States was seen as continuing to be sort of the keystone of this global system. But heavy industry would be transported out. One of the comments made about heavy industry was that we had had enough environmental damage from smoke stacks and industrial waste. Other people could put up with that for a while. This again was supposed to be a redeeming quality for Americans to accept. You took away our industry but you saved our environment. So we really didn't lose on it.




SHIFTING POPULATIONS AND ECONOMIES - TEARING THE SOCIAL ROOTS


And along this line there were talks about people losing their jobs as a result of industry and opportunities for retraining, and particularly population shifts would be brought about. This is sort of an aside. I think I'll explore the aside before I forget it. Population shifts were to be brought about so that people would be tending to move into the Sun Belt. They would be the sort of people without roots in their new locations, and traditions are easier to change in a place where there are a lot of transplanted people, as compared to trying to change traditions in a place where people grew up and had an extended family, and had roots. Things like new medical care systems, if you pick up from a Northeast industrial city and you transplant yourself to the South Sunbelt or Southwest, you'll be more accepting of whatever kind of, for example, controlled medical care you find there than you would accept a change in the medical care system where you had roots and the support of your family. Also in this vein was mentioned (he used the plural personal pronoun we) we take control first of the port cities - New York, San Francisco, Seattle - the idea being that this is a piece of strategy, the idea being that if you control the port cities with your philosophy and your way of life, the heartland in between has to yield. I can't elaborate more on that but it is interesting. The heartland, the Midwest, does seem to have maintained its conservatism. But as you take away industry and jobs and relocate people then this is a strategy to break down conservatism. When you take away industry and people are unemployed and poor they will accept whatever change seems, to offer them survival, and their morals and their commitment to things will all give way to survival. That's not my philosophy, that's the speaker's philosophy. Anyhow, going back to industry, some heavy industry would remain, just enough to maintain a sort of a seed bed of industrial skills which could be expanded if the plan didn't work out as it was intended. So the country would not be devoid of assets and skills. But this was just sort of a contingency plan. It was hoped and expected that the world-wide specialisation would be carried on. But, perhaps repeating myself, one of the upshots of all of this is that with this 'global interdependence' the national identities would tend to be de-emphasised. Each area depended on every other area for one or another elements of its life. We would all become citizens of the world rather than citizens of any one country.

Full transcripts on all subjects can be found at: http://rense.com/general94/nwoplans.htm

Judgement and basic psychology, best friends forever

This is a note addressed to a particular video that lists characteristics of people and throws them under certain titles. As I watched the list of characteristics tick down I had to address some personal thoughts that were going through my mind.  What makes me sicker than these "disfunctional people" that are put so proudly on display in the video for people to "watch out for" is people who constantly judge and point fingers, I am in control of My life and no one is going to ruin it for me, sociopath or not..... As I am not denying the existance of these people in the video I disagree with dehumanizing individuals and also think that the more time spent overthinking and charting a persons' life, the more they would fit in with these labels. There are many ways we are pitted against each other, surely there should be a break from it, right? Apparantly it is so much more joyous to constantly be at a type of war with each other. I have certainly led a safe enough life away from these 'psychotic dangers' but have not been nearly as successful in avoiding judgemental, fear-driven individuals.

Singing out Peace

Be grateful when approval is expressed to you and be mindful of how you receive it. Let it in fully, but remember to express thanks and acceptance. Don't let compliments, even small ones, fall to the wayside or be ignored. Appreciation, and recognition will always make a relationship better. Your heart is opening wider with every breath. This will happen naturally, but it will help to keep a clear focus on inner joy. This is a time do things you truly love doing, Do what makes your heart sing. If you seek approval from someone special it may open you up to manipulation and negative external forces. Be wary of placing too high a value on the approval of others. Instead,value inner resolve.

CIA Secret Experiments 1/5